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[beknighted]

NCAA Announces Changes in Women’s Basketball Selection and Seeding Process

Indianapolis, April 1 (AF) – At a press conference late Monday, the National Collegiate Athletic Association’s Division I Women’s Basketball Committee announced that the NCAA has adopted a new process for selecting and seeding its annual national championship tournament. This process removes the responsibility for selection and seeding from the committee and creates a new tournament subcommittee that is responsible for all matters related to the operation of the tournament.

According to Judy Southard, the chair of the Women’s Basketball Committee, “we’ve realized that, because of our other responsibilities, our members just don’t have enough time to devote to determining which teams deserve to be in the tournament and how to seed them,” she said. “We’ve now identified individuals who already are doing just that and who have been all too happy to lend their expertise to our efforts. That’s why, starting next season, the tournament subcommittee will be composed of bracketologists, selected journalists, coaches and, of course, people who post on message boards.”

“We’ve already identified most of the people who will serve on the subcommittee. First, there’s Mel Greenberg, who did such a great job explaining how he thinks the committee is supposed to work this year. We’ve also asked Mechelle Voepel, although we’re a little worried about whether she’s really been dreaming about Mr. Greenberg and Matee Ajavon. Even though their group in the mock selection process only got through the first couple of lines in the bracket, we’re sure they’ll be willing to stay up 48 hours straight to get the whole thing done.”

The bracketologist representatives will be Jerry Palm of collegerpi.com and Charlie Creme of ESPN.com. “We understand from the men’s committee that they’re going to get Mr. Palm involved, too, but since he’s already doing both brackets for his web site, we’re sure he’ll have time,” explained committee member Lisa Parker, Associate Athletic Director at Boise State University. “And Mr. Creme can be the tournament subcommittee’s expert on the S-curve. Also, we need somebody who can be in the minority on most votes, and he’s wrong so often that he seemed like the best candidate.” Parker denied that Creme’s presence on the subcommittee would cause a conflict of interest, explaining that “we already get a list of the games ESPN wants to see from [ESPN executive vice president] John Wildhack before we start the process.”

The coaches on the subcommittee are slated to include Rutgers head coach C. Vivian Stringer and Stanford head coach Tara VanDerveer. When asked about the choice of Stringer, Southard said “Vivian always seems to have good ideas about how to fix problems in the brackets. It’s just a shame we haven’t had the opportunity to hear them before the brackets are announced, and including her will solve that problem. Of course, we hope she’ll have time between appearances on Good Morning America and Oprah.” Parker noted that VanDerveer was added “for geographical balance, because we think that’s the most important thing in a bracket, a committee and, well, everything,” adding that “she looked so sad when we announced this year’s seeds that we wanted to do something to cheer her up.”

Southard acknowledged that the committee was having some difficulty securing message board posters to include on the subcommittee. “There are lots of people who post brackets and seedings, and it’s clear they think they know what they’re doing. The problem is figuring out who they are.

“You know, this whole Internet anonymity thing is very annoying. It looks like we’re going to have to get the NSA to tell us who some of these people are, and they’re almost as secretive as we are.” She indicated that the committee was seeking help from anyone, including journalists at the press conference, who might know the actual identities of certain posters. “Does anybody know how we can get in touch with pilight, BeKnighted, YourCrimsonNightmare or Orange][Krush? Does anybody know how to pronounce Orange][Krush?”

In addition to selecting teams and setting the bracket, the tournament subcommittee will be responsible for such operational tasks as choosing referees and assigning tournament hotels to the teams. The main committee, however, will retain responsibility for handing out the trophies and other awards.

Although not every prospective tournament subcommittee member was available, several responded to requests for comment. Creme said that he hoped that the message board posters on the committee “would be less annoying than the people who keep asking me the same questions in during chats,” while Greenberg asked if there would be doughnuts at the committee sessions. In an email message sent through an anonymizer, BeKnighted did not provide his or her name, but did attach a 32-page analysis of the merits of every team to receive an at-large bid after losing in its conference tournament on a Wednesday since the tournament began in 1982.

Stringer looked startled and said “But I need to look at more tape. I don’t have time to do anything but look at tape. Don’t they know that?” When informed that the tournament subcommittee chooses the referees for the games, however, she said “Really?” smiled, and refused further comment, although she then was overheard telling Rutgers assistant coach Carlene Mitchell that the assistants would have to “pick up some additional tape review duties.”

Reaction from other coaches and tournament participants was mixed. University of Connecticut head coach Geno Auriemma and University of Tennessee head coach Pat Summitt, interviewed separately, both said “Well, at least we won’t be in the Rutgers bracket next year.” George Washington University head coach Joe McKeown said “How can I get on that subcommittee?” a sentiment echoed by coaches from Marist, Middle Tennessee, Utah and other teams in so-called “mid-major” conferences. Meanwhile, referees Tina Napier, Bonita Spence and Bob Trammell were reported to be applying for jobs officiating high school softball tournaments and other events that overlap with the NCAA’s championship.

Southard noted that the process of choosing tournament subcommittee members is not completed yet. “We need to be careful about this. It’s particularly important that our most vehement critics serve on this subcommittee because we believe they have best ideas for going forward,” she said, “Or at least that’s what they think.” When asked if rumors that the committee also was considering requiring that the new subcommittee release its entire S-curve and an ordered list of the ten teams that were next in line for at large slots were true, Southard said “Well, we haven’t decided yet, but with a new process in place, it surely would be helpful for the public to see the entire picture so they can provide the same kind of valuable, unbiased input we’ve been getting for so long from these coaches, journalists, bracketologists and Internet people. I know I’ll be reviewing the bracket very carefully to see if my LSU Lady Tigers are treated as fairly as we’ve treated them the last several years.”

[thatGAgirl]

Oh, that's TOO funny

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"You can play as hard as you want, but if you're stupid it doesn't matter"

- Diana Taurasi

[memphis10]

Starting early? April Fool!!!

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Anti-Barbie

R.I.P Shara 1993-2009
R.I.P. Taylor Bradford

[kage]

Happy April Fools Day!

Loved it, bek. Always a treat to read your AF report.

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http://img211.imageshack.us/img211/6329/lindseyhardingsig3oh2.jpg

[njjosh]

LOL! Well done BeK, as always.

[bullsky]

Hilarity!

[RedEqualsLuck]

LOVE IT!

Could we get a re-run of last years? I believe I peed in my pants reading it aloud to a friend.

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When Jefferson wrote: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal," he didn't include the word "except."

[braveniler58]

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Phoenix Mercury fan for life!

[thesixthwoman]

LOL.

[BallState1984]

Are you SURE this is April Fool's? This sounds like something those 365 24/7 fools would REALLY don.

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Terminally afffected with Our Girl Syndrome and proud of it!

[beknighted]

O][K: So it's the well-known silent "][," I see.

REL: Here's a link to last year's post:

News from Cleveland

[sbjules]